Monday, July 20, 2009

A Call for Body Glide

This is not a post for the faint of heart. Well, the ending at least.

For my long run this Saturday I decided to head over to One Texas Center at Barton Springs and South 1st and do a modified version of one of my favorite runs. I took off on South 1st, crossed Lady Bird Lake (it pains me to not say Town Lake) and up Colorado before weaseling my way over to Guadalupe. The goal for this run was to do 90 minutes, and as I had not done a true long run in quite some time, I was not exactly sure what to expect.

All in all I was feeling great. Made it down the drag and was headed north of campus. I even made it to Lamar with plenty of time to spare before turning back. At the 40 minute mark I hit 51st. I wasn’t quite sure of the ease in which I could find cross streets and such that would take me back to good southern bound routes after that so I decided I would just turn right onto 51st and make up the extra time on the hike and bike trail.

After hoping from Duval to Speedway, through campus and across the Capital grounds, I started to notice an annoying little sensation as I was running south down Congress. One of my nipples had begun to chafe a small amount, but not an insane amount; just enough to announce its presence. This was kind of odd as I had used Body Glide before my run. (For those wondering, Body Glide is a lubricant to reduce chaffing during running and comes in what looks like a deodorant stick.) So I go ahead and hang a right and jump onto the hike and bike trail at Congress and proceed onwards to the Pfluger Foot Bridge. As I am making my along the trail I start getting this weird sense that people are looking at me with an abnormal amount of curiosity. I know I am sweaty and certainly a little flushed in the face, but I am not wheezing for making any strange grunting noises so I am a tad perplexed. (Somewhere in the back of my mind I was certain it was just because they had never before seen running demonstrated in such a magnificent and graceful way. I like to live in a fantasy world. And yes, the unicorns do run beside me.)

Finally I made my way back to the parking lot of One Texas Center and after 90 minutes I had covered 11 miles. As I began to walk around a little to get my cool down in that I realized why everyone had been giving me perplexed looks; there, on the front of my shirt was a sweat diluted blood stain leading down from my right nipple. Lovely!

The moral of this story is to always use more Body Glide than you think is necessary. Or it just serves as yet another great thing to laugh at me about. I’ll let you all decide.

In the meantime, have fun, stay safe, run friendly, and wave; even to the guy with the bloody nipple. –Tanner

PS I have a strong sense that I was jumping from one verb tense to another throughout this. I am too lazy to go back and make the changes.

1 comment: